“Bankruptcy of the Heart”

Broken heart sewn back together
Image via Wikipedia

Although you deceived and escaped with gain,

There was no way for me to avoid the pain,

 You claimed no guilt for my heart’s theft,

Yet I was emotionally spent and all bereft,

There should have been a siren to put out an alert,

I’m tired of being cheated, confused, and hurt,

I’m bankrupt and my poor heart is overdrawn,

I’ve loved unwisely, the conclusion is foregone,

You broke into my heart with honeyed deceit,

You withdrew my love and left me in defeat,

My love account depleted, my reputation shattered,

Then you were gone, nothing else really mattered,

Where can I go to find love to earn?

Will I fall for another who gives little in return?

I can’t trust my emotions for they can deceive,

Can I trust my thoughts? What can I truly believe?

Seven years of a broken heart till I trust once more,

Seven years of loneliness before I’m restored,

You were living high on love at the expense of me,

Even though you knew I loved you desperately,

Now in limbo because  love was all that mattered,

My love is depleted and my poor heart shattered,

You took all my love and left little in return,

Now I’m bankrupt and my heart is overdrawn.

Yesterday Was the Day

Yesterday Was the Day

She stooped and picked up a shell,

She studied it closely, then threw it away,

I became her throwaway yesterday,

I thought I knew her so well,

As they circled above the seagulls cried,

For they knew how love ebbs and flows,

My heart was aching, that’s how it goes,

Yesterday was the day my love for her died,

She smiled at me as if nothing was wrong,

But she kept that secret out of reach,

And continued walking down the beach,

She knew she was leaving all along,

We had lunch at one, then she said goodbye,

She drove away, then turned and waved,

In my memory a lasting impression I saved,

She was going back to her other guy,

I walked bravely along the lonely shore,

As the fog rolled in to fill the space,

Tears of pain rolled down my face,

While I listened to the waves’ constant roar,

A group of laughing people passed me by,

They couldn’t tell how long I cried,

Yesterday was the day that my love died,

I smiled at them, my face frozen in a lie.

Push With Toes, Pull With Fingers

Push With Toes, Pull With Fingers

(Nighttime Insanity)

I am disappointed,

I thought you were the one,

I didn’t think you would take,

My heart and simply run,

You’ve left me with nothing but memories,

The world looked the same today as I made my rounds,

But within these walls my loneliness abounds,

My thoughts are well beyond repair,

I sink deeper and deeper into despair,

And louder and louder my heart pounds,

There is motion but it is within me,

My head is spinning, wild and free,

Distraught is how I might describe myself,

Not that I am bad or crazy,

Worthless or weak, but human,

Trying to sort out life,

And sort out our strife,

 In a compressed span of time,

Your words painted me a picture,

A truly great work of art,

How you would love me forever,

Instead you broke my heart,

Your words I don’t want to keep,

I close my eyes and try to sleep,

 But my feet and legs twitch,

I try to and picture a peaceful mountain far away,

But I am compelled to ascend,

Grabbing knobs and buttresses that rise into the sky,

I can’t do this, let another night go by,

Acrophobia, possibility of hypothermia,

Push with toes, pull with fingers, don’t slip,

I’m falling into a vast crevasse, I’ve lost my grip,

My eyes pop open, I reach for you,

Why don’t I go and search for someone, anyone would do,

 Just don’t be alone,

I imagine going out,

But I’m indecisive, there is doubt,

 If I found you, or if I didn’t,

I didn’t know which would be worse,

I lie down again, and I silently curse,

I’m weary and fall asleep,

But tension won’t let peace keep,

And I’m fighting for my sanity to save,

I’m in the yawning mouth of a cave,

The temperature drops and all is quiet and dark,

My reasoning is off its mark,

Time seems to have stopped,

My breathing is soft and measured,

Claustrophobia, possibility of hypothermia,

Push with toes, pull with fingers,

Wriggle your way forward,

Relax, exhale, you’re stuck,

 Stuck like a cork in a bottle,

I guess you’re out of luck,

But no, I rise to meet the dawning,

I’ll begin my life anew,

My life has lost its meaning,

There will never be another you.

Up ↑